You know, its something that every one has to do. It is just a natural part of life.
You eat a little something and a little while later, it is time. You drink a little something and a few minutes later, you feel the need.
Of course, I am talking about going to the bathroom. Like the books says, ‘Everybody poops and everybody pees’. It is just natural and we all do it.
But as a mommy, going to the bathroom can be a little more challenging.
First there is that fact that after having babies, our bladders are constantly mad at us for allowing them to be stomped on and kicked by said babies for 9 plus months. So they refuse to hold in the pee like they should.
Second, we never go to the bathroom when we should. I don’t know about you but I find that after I make sure that everyone else has used the bathroom before we go somewhere, I tend to forget about myself. So I end up with a super full, leaky bladder (because of the first reason) while walking through the stores or while driving somewhere.
And lastly, going to the bathroom can be challenging because with small children, doing your business is now a spectator sport. Kids just love to follow you into the bathroom and watch mommy pee. Even if you shut the door they will figure out a way to open it. And locking the door doesn’t work because that is a cue to every child everywhere that it is time to create get havoc in the house.
Yes, yes bathroom time can be challenging but as time goes on, things start to get a little better.
My bladder stopped being so angry at me since it knows that there will be no more children coming from me. I have been able to remember to actually pee before leaving the house and watching me pee has become boring to my kids so they don’t care anymore.
I thought I was in the clear. I thought that bathroom time was once again my time. I thought all the challenges of relieving my bladder were going to be a thing of the past.
But recently, a new challenge has presented itself.
For you see, now with three of the four children using the potty there seems to be a continual shortage of toilet paper in the bathroom. No matter how much I stock in there the roll always seems to be empty. More specifically, its empty when I sit down to go.
So I am left with a dilemma.
I can either call for my children to come into the bathroom, answer a thousand questions about what I am doing and why I have a ‘hairy ‘agina’ and ruin my alone bathroom time or I can do the walk of shame with my pants around my ankles to get the tissue box that we keep in the kitchen praying that none of my neighbors see my bare ass through my windows.
Such a tough choice.
But maybe there is a third option. Maybe I can just show my kids where the toilet paper is kept and they could get it for me when I call.
Yeah right. I can’t even get my kids to remember where all their toys go let alone follow through and put them there.
So neighbors be aware, bare assing it is.
What, you thought I would call the the kids into the bathroom? No way, my bathroom alone time is way too precious.