“Mommy” Quinn whined.
“Mmmmmm….” I said opening my eyes just a bit.
“Mommy, I am hungry,” he said right in my face.
“Mmm…” I said patting him on the head.
“Mommy,” Quinn said more forcefully, “I am hungry.”
“Five more minutes, Quinn. Five more minutes,” I said as I turned over.
Thankfully, he took the hint and ran out of my bedroom.
I closed my eyes and was just about ready to return to dreamland when I heard footsteps running towards my bedroom.
“Alright, alright,” I said throwing the covers off of me, “I am up.”
I planted my feet on the floor and with a large sigh, I shuffled my feet towards the kitchen.
There was one thing on my mind, coffee.
It had been a rough night with lots of little visitors including two that thought that 3am was a good time to wake up and start their day.
I needed coffee to start my brain functioning so that I could safely make breakfast without burning the house down because a caffeine starved brain and a toaster is a dangerous combination.
“Mommy,” Quinn said stopping fast in front of me.
I looked down at him and put my finger to my lips, “Shhhhh…” I said.
“But mommy,” he began with an appalled look on his face, “Claire stuck her finger in her butt and made me smell it.”
I just stood there looking at him.
“Mommy. Claire put her finger in her ‘agina butt and made me smell it,” Quinn said. “Her ‘agina!”
I stood there dumbfounded my brain barely comprehending what Quinn was saying to me when another child spoke up.
“Mommy,” Jake said as he came out of the bathroom, “the toilet won’t flush any more.”
“What?” I said trying to shake my confusion off from what Quinn told me and pay attention to what Jake was telling me.
Jake began to walk away and Quinn still stood their looking at me with horror about being made to smell a butt finger.
I looked at Quinn and made a mental note to deal with Claire and her new smell my finger trick but right now the toilet issue seemed more pressing.
Suddenly, my ears tuned into the fact that water was pouring on the floor which was confirmed visually as I rounded the corner and saw the toilet overflowing.
“Jacob!” I screamed. “What in the world happened here?”
“Mommy, I put all the toilet paper in the toilet,” he said matter-of-factly.
“Why?” I asked curiousity getting the better of me.
“Mommy, there were two turds that won’t go away so I had to put all the toilet paper in there,” he said as he bounced away.
With the bathroom floor getting wetter by the second, I searched for the plunger but of course, didn’t find it.
So I did what any person would do, I reached in the toilet and pulled out a wad of toilet paper the size of my head.
Instantly the water was sucked in and down in a flush.
I threw the toilet paper wad in the trash, washed my hand, growled at a smiling Jake, gave Quinn a sympathetic touch as to say, yeah I know ‘agina’s can be stinky I own one and then headed right to the coffee maker.
I needed coffee before the next “Mommy” happened.