I’m Naked… So What?

 I stripped out of my clothes and threw them into the washer on my way to take a shower.

“Mom, can I have some juice?” one of the kids asked me as I stepped out of the laundry room.

I looked down at my necked body and was about the protest but only sighed. I grabbed the cup from the child and walked into the kitchen, filled it with juice, handed it back to the child and then got into the shower.

Yes, it’s true that I did this all while naked.

Is this my best choice? Probably not but sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do to be able to take a peaceful shower.

As I stood in the shower the water running over me, I remember a time in my life when there were only three things that I did naked. There was a time in my life that I wouldn’t dream of being naked in front of people, let alone do things while naked.

If you guess this was a time before children, then yes, you would be totally correct.

Before I had children the only things that I did naked were:

Shower- duh that is obvious even though sometimes in college the idea of wearing clothes while showering to wash them and my body at once did occur to me.

Sex- clothes really just get in the way here.

Hide from people in the gym locker room- I don’t know why because my pre-kids body was much pretty and perkier than it is today but I always felt like I needed to run and hide from anyone that came into the gym locker room. I was a pro and angling lockers to hide all my girlie parts.

After I had children, there are many, many things that I do naked:

Fill juice cups

Get snacks

Zip up coats

Close doors to the outside

Break up fights

Strap on bike helmets

Answer the phone

Make a tweet- if I don’t, it will be lost forever in my mind and that is just a disservice to my followers.

Answer questions like why is the sky blue or where is my favorite Iron Man toy?

Yell at the kids to stop being ridiculous

Tie shoes

Deal with irrational freak outs

Do laundry

And the list could go on. It’s like I am living a regular nudest life style over here.

Now just so you know, I do not prefer to do these things naked. It’s just that sometimes, I am forced to by the children who ulitmately proceed to laugh at me because I am naked and my body is all ‘squishy and floppy’ but refuse to wait until I can put clothes on.

Someday, I hope to get back to the days were being naked is once again saved only for the shower and sex.

But right now with my house full of four demanding children, who don’t mind being naked themselves, I just don’t see it happening.

So I’ll embrace it… for now.

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  1. If I tried to do everything with clothes on, I’d never get anything done! I swear it’s like they wait until you get naked to ask you to do something/anything for them!

  2. story of my life right there…
    except now I have the added joy of my oldest kids pointing at me and laughing like I’m a circus freak…

  3. For me, it’s more half-naked. Like, I didn’t even get a chance to finish dressing/undressing.
    The little old German lady across the street, the one with the binoculars, has got to be scarred by now.

  4. HAHAHAHAAAA! I am constantly doing things naked. Its like the minute I begin undressing is the minute they decide they need something. Absolutely ridiculous!

  5. I keep wondering when my kids will be all “ewww gross, mom’s naked” and then I can say, “well get out of my room then” and they’ll run into the other room. That day will be full of awesome.

  6. Are you telling me that clothes are supposed to come off????

  7. I was JUST thinking about this today when I thought- on the way to the shower- why, I’ll just clean up a littl in the kids’ play room. WHY?

  8. Great. Now every time I see a tweet from you I’m gonna wonder… 😉

  9. Oh, this was the funniest thing I have read in a while! My son closes the top of my robe if it pops open just a bit. He really, really is terrified of seeing anything beyond my hands and feet.

    Great post!!

  10. Hi Jen,
    Next time I read one of your tweets, I’ll wonder…”Was Jen necked when she wrote this?” :)

  11. So I am forever going to wonder if you were dressed writing this….

  12. Haha! totally funny, and totally true! :)

  13. My children don’t even notice that I’m naked. They just want me to answer their demands, no matter what. Little punks.

  14. Clothes are so over rated.

  15. Imperfectmomma says:

    Yeah. I was one of those too. Naked outside of my bedroom? Never heard of…til these little kids came around I was such a modest person.

  16. Yep. This is the story of my life too. However, I no longer sleep naked (as I once did), because too often, any or all of the above has to happen within seconds of leaving my bed.

  17. I am always naked. Or at least half way dressed with no panties on.

  18. i think my children think that the bathroom is a magic box where any number of wonderful things could be happening, because every time they hear me going in or out, they’re there three seconds after being all “what are you doing mommy?” “why?” “can i help?”

  19. I was very grateful for my bathrobe that was hanging in the bathroom the other day when my son came up needing a band aid. And why is it that we can be naked, in the shower, and the kids can walk right past Daddy, who’s just sitting there but they have to ask MOM for help?? I don’t get it!

    PS…sorry I’ve not commented in forever…trying to catch up some!

  20. Ha, who needs clothes anyway?

    I thought that WAS your bathroom at first and was going to be so jealous.

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