I am pretty sure that any mom will tell you what a roller coaster ride motherhood is.
There are some of the highest highs and the lowest lows and then everything else in the middle all wrapped up into these little people who are parts of your soul walking outside your body.
We love them with every fiber of our being and one minute we can be surrounded by warm fuzzys and then next cold pricklys are pumping through our veins.
Because of this, children need a defense mechanism.
Like how puppies and kittens are so cute. They need to be so that we don’t throw them against the wall and stomp on their heads when they poop on the carpet for the millionth time, chew a brand new pair of $200 shoes or rip to shreds a couch that had been in the home for less than a week.
Children need that kind of power too.
Sure, children have cuteness but they need more since they are dealing with us moms who at times can be emotional messes.
Since it was just Mother’s Day, I thought that I could take my time getting ready. I wanted to take picking out my clothes and play around with a little extra make-up. I didn’t care that we were going any were special, those things just make me happy. Plus alone time in the bathroom when not rushed to bring someone here or there is a luxury, one I don’t often get.
Jeff being the wonderful husband he is, helped with this matter by sending all the children outside.
The house was quiet and I was alone in the bathroom, happily playing with eye liner and false eye lashes.
Then Jeff made a fatal error… he decided to take this opportunity to answer the call of nature. He grabbed his iPhone and retreated to his bathroom.
Oh, silly man. He does not realize that the children know. They know instantly when the ‘gaurd’ is away from mommy.
And they will come running.
Now why the children don’t go to the bathroom to ask Daddy things, I will never know. Me being busy in the bathroom has never stopped them but Daddy busy in the bathroom, God forbid, the children inturput him in there.
“Mom, can I have a snack?”
“Mom, can the snack be Gogurt?”
“Mom, I can get it myself?”
Mom, he wants a Gogurt too.”
“Mom, can she have a Gogurt?”
“Mom, can I have a strawberry one?”
“Mom, can I have a berry one?”
“Mom, can it have Sponge Bob on it?”
“Mom, I don’t want Squidword. Sponge Bob, mom. Sponge Bob!”
“Mom, I can open it.”
“Mom, I need scissors.”
“Mom, can you open it?
“Mom, some fell on the floor?”
“Mom, can I lick it off the floor?”
Suddenly these little people surround me with a thousand requests running in and out of the bathroom just as I have begun the delicate operation of attaching false eye lashes to my face.
But then as if they can see my stress level rising, the roller coast getting ready to reach it’s climax, they go in and defuse the situation.
No mommy head exploding here.
They use their God give ‘defense mechanism’ and do the one thing that makes it all better.
“Mommy… you’d are the best. And the prettiest! Happy Mofther’s Day!”
And once again the warm fuzzy feeling is back and I am putty in their hands.
Sure, one of my eye lids is glued shut, there is a child trying to shut a chair in the fridge and yogurt is all over the floor.
I just don’t care.
Well, I care, just not enough to go bat shit crazy on them.
Because there is no way to melt a mommy faster than to tell her she is loved and pretty.
Saying she is pretty helps… a lot.