Two weeks ago, my life completely changed.
I knew that this change was coming and I was really excited about it.
But now, after living with this for a couple of weeks, I realize that I have been effected in ways that I never thought possible.
The change that happened in my life… well, I am now an empty nester.
Ok, fine not really because my children didn’t all grow up to be adults over the summer and leave my house for good but because of school they do leave my house for a most of the day, leaving me with an empty nest.
Of course, my nest fills up again at 4pm but that is besides the point.
I am now a mother of 4 school aged children who leave me to my own devices from 8am to 4pm every single day.
Now before you all throw stones at me and wish that you could be in my shoes, I am going to stop and say that I am not complaining about this.
It’s nice to be alone. It’s wonderful not have to rush through a shower because someone is putting peanut butter on the cat. It’s fabulous to be able to have a phone conversation without someone screaming in the background like their arm is being pulled off. And it’s heaven to be able to sit down and read a book without rereading the same sentence over and over because I had to get up 12 times to get someone juice.
No, I am not complaining.
It’s just that after being (semi… semi because I work part time) full time mom for 8 years, all this ‘me time’ is a bit overwhelming.
I feel a little lost. I find myself pouring sippy cups just because and not flushing the toilet because well, that’s how am I used to seeing the toilets… full of shit.
And I need to blare music through the house because the silence makes me uncomfortable.
Yes, the idea of being home all the time without kids is wonderful but the reality, well, that is a little scary. And I now understand why some woman decided to have another baby after all their kids are in school or at the very least get a puppy. When you are used to the non-stop chaos of children and then it suddenly ends because of school… talk about your mental breakdown.
But this is my life now.
My kids need to go to school because I am not going to school them at home and I have to get used to being by myself. I am not going to lie, the first few days of this were rough and I spent time trying to make the kids think they were sick so that one of them could be home with me.
“Oh honey, that hang nail is pretty bad. I think you better stay home today,” I would say.
Thankfully, my kids are smart and they would just run and get a bandaid and all was well.
I am getting used to being home alone. The days are filling up and I am finding other moms in my same situation and we are doing lunch. I am a lady of doing lunch. I can write without being distracted and I even decided to signed up for a humor writing class.
This is a time for me. I can once again put time and energy into my dreams. I can breath life into old passions and pursue new ones. The world is my oyster, as long as I am at the bus stop buy 4pm to get the kids, there is nothing I can’t do.
I know it sounds silly but somehow, I convinced myself that I was done being a mother when I had all my kids in school. I realized that is far from the truth. I am still a mother, I will always be a mother. It’s just that my mothering is changing and in a lot of ways becoming more complicated.
But the big question is still out there… what do I do all day?
Well, nothing is set is stone and it’s a little different each day.
Honestly, I am still trying to figure it out and I have yet to tackle that project list I have been making for last few years.
But here is a glimpse at my typical day (in no real order).
1. “Hi, I’m Mom! And I will be your short order cook.”
2. Ah, look… cats in a box… so cute!
3. Looking fabulous while driving
4. Walk by pile of toys and think, “Man, someone needs to clean that up”
5. Watching my most favorite show of all time… “Charmed” with Twitter and coffee
6. “Huh, I wonder if these dog costumes would fit my cats. Cats love being dressed up.”
7. Dinner making and laundry
8. Making shadows puppets while walking
9. Playing ‘Mom Taxi’
So if you are new to this ‘all kids in school’… how are you filling your time? And don’t say cleaning because I am not cleaning. Never have, never will.
This post if part of Writer’s Workshop